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December 12, 2008
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Who am I? Where am I?

The questions plagued the girl. She couldn't remember... anything.

It was dark. Wet. And cold. Her breath steamed up in front of her, her muscles contracted involuntarily with shivers. She clenched her teeth together, gripping her own arms with icy fingers.

The street was black and damp, steam rising from grates in the sidewalk. The buildings were made of exposed steel, graffitied concrete, and broken glass. It smelled bad, trash and urine, crumbling rock and wet asphalt.

Then it started to snow. Flakes hit her bare arms and legs, her face, stinging like needles.

The hairs on the back of her neck prickled in a vague sense of unease, something like being watched, and she whirled, searching the shadows with eyes that seemed perhaps too keen. A feeling of wrongness washed over her, and inexplicable dread settled cold in the pit of her stomach. Evil. It felt like evil.

A footstep behind her. She spun, saw nothing. Had she really heard it? Or was her mind playing tricks on her?

A rustle of fabric, leather brushing leather. Again she turned, and again nothing. The girl ground her teeth together, the bad feeling increasing in intensity even though it seemed unfounded. Fear curled through her.

Another smell joined the myriad of others. It was disgusting, like rotten eggs. Sulfur. The girl blinked, wondering how she could recognize the smell, wondering why it seemed so familiar, and… hated. Feared. What is it? Why can’t I remember anything?

Frustration made her angry, bold. She dropped her arms, her hands balling into fists and called, “Show yourself.” No, that didn’t feel like the right thing to say, but it was what came out. The girl waited, feeling the malevolence increase. She could feel them, things, beings, more than one. Not human.

Not human?

Despite the absurdity of the thought, it felt right. She knew it was truth, that there were things other than humans. Supernatural, unimaginable beings. Humans weren’t the top of the food chain as they believed.

The girl shivered. How could she know these things, but not her own name?

A raspy chuckle broke through her thoughts. Spinning, she still couldn’t see anything in the shadows. They were surrounding her, she could feel it, sense it. Oh God. Did she believe in God? She couldn’t remember if she had before, but now she prayed that He was real, and that He would help her.
don't know why I'm posting this.
:iconepic-failplz:
w/e.

i feel like utter crap. cuz im stupid. and life is stupid.
yay.

~Jim



(that emo angel does not belong to me. it belongs to... Google. lol w/e. no copyright infringements, i hope?)


oh, and remember that purple-eyed angel, that i posted a couple drawings of? didn't think so. but w/e. he's a fallen angel and a vampire. this is about him... and a girl. romance ftw.
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:iconslightly-odd:
Slightly-Odd Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2008
This is most definitely not a failure. I like the sense of suspense and urgency you've created, the confusion of the girl adds to the tension, and there's just enough description of setting to create a vivid image without getting in the way of what's happening. It's very atmospheric and a great hook :) (I really want to read more... Hint hint :P)
Life is stupid, but you're definitely not.
Reply
:iconamarimono:
Amarimono Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
I hate your freaking cliff-hangers.... grr.

post more soon please, Cure! -glomps-
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:iconthereisnocure4me:
ThereIsNoCure4Me Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2008
LOL XDDDD sorry bout that!

okie asap <3333
Reply
:iconamarimono:
Amarimono Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
I heart you Cure! -huggles-
Reply
:iconthereisnocure4me:
ThereIsNoCure4Me Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2008
lol yayhearts! <3333333333
Reply
:iconkittycat1805:
Kittycat1805 Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2008
I think everybody agrees that you rock, ya know. This is not a failure, I'm hooked. You've caught my interest. I'm intruiged etc.
Reply
:iconthereisnocure4me:
ThereIsNoCure4Me Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2008
LOL XD
awesome :D
<33333
Reply
:iconron-brouillette:
ron-brouillette Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2008   Writer
Nice hidden sense of urgency, and revealing just enough of the surroundings to make the reader feel for the main character. You show a lot of skill in your writing, and this piece is very impressive,, and one of the few I find on DA I can truly say I enjoyed reading. Bravo.
Reply
:iconthereisnocure4me:
ThereIsNoCure4Me Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2008
wow thank you very very much!! :D
Reply
:iconkunochi-weasel:
kunochi-weasel Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2008
u has writing skillz plz
XD
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